I am smarter than you

A quote by me to you,  circa January, 2010, when I didn't yet quite understand what was going on with you:

"I am smarter than you, I am younger than you, and I know how you think because what is in you is in me too.  You won't get away trying to outsmart me".

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I would never say that to you today.  There is no need to say anything like that today

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This was at the time you were changing banks every few days, and traveling from Western Union to Moneygram, wiring your money away forever, all under the direction of the internet scammers, who had instructed you to keep the truth from your family (and when you saw me as the enemy instead of your only true friend and advocate).

see:

http://seniorfraud.blogspot.com/2012/01/your-father-is-wiring-38k-to-africa.html

http://seniorfraud.blogspot.com/2013/09/over-21k-lost-in-december.html

http://seniorfraud.blogspot.com/2014/11/first-contact-with-scammer-peter.html

http://seniorfraud.blogspot.com/2014/11/unclaimed-assets-avery-dion-patrick.html

http://seniorfraud.blogspot.com/2014/11/john-england-david-donaldson-scam-2010.html

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This was at a time when I literally sent a letter to every bank in the 70 mile region, along with legal documents permitting them to talk to me.

I did it to protect you.  To protect you from yourself, and from the evil influences that had penetrated your life.

https://seniorfraud.blogspot.com/2017/10/example-letter-to-all-regional-banks.html **********************

I still have the phone numbers for the secret service, FBI, social services  and way too many sheriff's offices.

Thanksgiving arrest 2012

As I write this blog I now realize that you have been arrested more than once, in the days around Thanskgiving.
Is there something about the time of year?

http://seniorfraud.blogspot.com/2015/02/arrest-as-route-to-hospitalization-2010.html
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About one week before Thanksgiving, without any notice, you depart from the senior condo and drive to the farm homestead town in rural Minnesota.
Your intention is to see the doctor there so they can give you back your drivers license.

http://seniorfraud.blogspot.com/2015/02/too-old-and-demented-to-drive.html

You are sure that they will give you anything you ask for.

I first learn of your trip when you call me from the garage, unable to get into the house, your house, the house you built. I talk you through the steps.

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The doctor calls me, informing me you gave him permission to call and get the history, since you are unable to provide your medical history or your med list.   I say, "did you notice the dialysis fistula in his arm?", as well as other pertinent history.
I tell the doctor you don't have a valid drivers license, that you recently failed the driving test.
The doctor informs me that he must call the police (since it is obvious you drove to the appointment and you would be driving again as soon as you leave the appointment).
I don't know what happened after that  -- nobody called me to inform me of anything.

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Its 3 days before Thanskgiving.  You are still alone at the farm homestead.  I call you around 7 PM only to learn that you are heading back home to the city condo tonight.  However, you are sitting at the kitchen table of distant relatives, off the beaten path, a deviation from the usual route we take between locations.  Its dark outside and you are in a strange place, driving without a license.   I don't even like to drive in the dark and I am much younger than you.
I say, "try not to get killed or kill anyone tonight Dad", and we hang up.
Exhausted, I  go to bed and sleep, not realizing that events continue to play out many miles away.

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its 6:30 AM, 2 days before Thansgiving. The phone rings.  Its my aunt, your sister in law.  She tells me you are in Mankato - 90 miles away.   You called her after you couldn't reach me.

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The jitterbug cell phone has my home phone number keyed in as well as my cell phone, office, phone.  Still, you couldn't reach me (purely due to your telephone incompetence).  The staff at the Super 8 hotel helped you get through to my aunt.

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The police found you on highway 14, driving too slow.  I am sure you were lost, having taken an alternate route, driving in the dark, at 10 PM.  They next learned the drivers license wasn't valid.  For the first time you now believe that you don't have a valid drivers license.
The police leave the car on the road and take you to the Super 8 hotel.  What else would you do with an 81 year old guy who was driving 90 miles from home at 10 PM at night?

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"come and get me", you say.


"I can't just drop everything and come and get you because you are driving without a license", I say. I have a job, a schedule I need to keep, people who are depending on me to be responsible.

I didn't pick you up until Thanksgiving morning.

On the way home you agreed to put the car away for the winter.  Actually, you never drove again after this.

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The stay at the Super 8 was actually like a little vacation, quite enjoyable. They had free coffee and donuts in the lobby.

The house-keeping staff entertained you.  You could easily walk next door to the Happy Chef for meals.

Who would have thought getting arrested could be so fun?

Arrest as a route to hospitalization, 2010

I have a deadline and not enough time to do the work.

It is the day after Thanksgiving, 2010.
You have made the 180 mile trek to my house and we had a nice holiday dinner yesterday. You are still driving at this time, and seemingly baseline, even though we had the incompetence related/ scam  events in late 2009/early 2010.  Still, I have changed the locks on my doors.  You no longer have a key to my house -  I can't trust who you are interacting with, who might manipulate you, and what risks that would give me.

I don't even know what happened that day, how our conversation suddenly deteriorated. I can't remember the details this many years later as I write this story.  However, I remember that its as though you had a 2nd sense that I didn't have time to get into a hassle with you. And, you were looking for a fight.

We have been remodeling a condo for you nearby.  You have the key to the new place, your future home.  You are partly moved in there, in fact.
I don't have time to waste on a fight, especially not today.
I suggest that you should leave my house now,  go back to your own place.
But you refuse.  You continue to want to fight.
I ask you to leave, but you refuse, again and again.

Eventually, I call the police.  It isn't the first time I have called the authorities about you.  But it is the first time I have called the police in this location, my own home.

Soon they arrive, 2 officers, a man and a woman, in a squad car.
You tell them your complaint about me, the details which I can't remember anymore.  Actually, I believe the complaint was that you had supported me through college and graduate education.
You now feel I need to pay you back , 25 years after the fact.   Or, it was because you don't think that I repaid the loan on a piano I bought in 1980 (I think I did).    I know you want the money to continue your delusional interactions with the scammers.  It is hurtful to hear you harbor and express these negative feelings about me, related to events of my childhood.

I tell them that I had asked you to leave and that you refused.  You continue to refuse.
The officers are  respectful of the fact that I had asked you to go and you continue to not take it seriously.  You continue to refuse to leave.  Eventually they arrest  you.  They ask me what to do with you and I recommend theytake you to the hospital, to the hospital where I know there is psychiatry intake through the emergency room.

I sadly watch out the window.
I see my elderly father, between 2 police officers, walking to the police car. They place you inside the car, and they drive away.

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A while later the emergency room doctor calls me.  She volunteers, "my mother has dementia too".
What a comfort those words were to me, that someone understood.

They keep you a few hours, but they don't have enough to hold you.  Eventually they call me to come and get you.

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You are sitting in an exam room, in the Emergency room, unconcerned, as if you didn't just get escorted to the hospital by the police.

I help you check out, which includes a referral for outpatient psychiatry follow up.

 We drive home in silence.  As we get closer to my house, where your car is parked, I think to myself that I can't let you back in the house or the same thing is going to start up again.  Its not really over.
I don't have time for this -- I have a deadline related to work, I really need to get back to work, and I can't afford more time to fight with you over nonsense.
How am I going to prevent the same thing  from happening inside my house again?
I pull up in front of the house, and I tell you that I am going to drop you off, while I pull around to the back (the story doesn't even make sense to me today as I write this, I can't remember how I came up with a story to get you out of the car, thinking that things were normal).
I drive to the back , enter the back of the house, but I don't open  the front door, and I don't let you back in.
You have your car keys, and a new condo to stay in , only a mile away.  Its not like I am abandoning you on the street.

I can still remember how you POUNDED on the door, in a rage, once you realized I had tricked you ...... yes, it would have happened again had I let you back in.

But, eventually you go back home to your own place, and the event ends, never to recur.

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Its hard to believe today, in 2015, that such terrible things happened back then in 2010.  But it was all part of the process.

As we moved forward, as your mind got less clear, as you stepped lower in your brain functional abilities, we passed through phases.
At some point normal barriers and social restraints were lost.
Arrest is probably not an uncommon route to hospitalization for those in similar situations.  Unfortunately, the system didn't easily accommodate to hold you there, or more importantly, to fix you.  I now believe that it was impossible to fix you then.  You were normal enough to be out there freely living in the world, and you were abnormal enough to get into lots of trouble.
Luckily, today the crazy mean and violent days seem to be gone forever, as you are now too forgetful to hold grudges, and you are too frail to be a physical threat.

what you should do if this happens to you ; Alternative title: We didn't sue the bank

1.   Be aware that the ideal / already conned victim may view your interests and actions to protect them from scammers  as hostile .
      a.  Your trusted parent /loved one may not see you as their advocate even if you are only acting in their self interest. They are built up, flattered, reinforced  and instructed by the CON artists to keep the truth from you and to prove to you that they are right and you are wrong.
   
In my case, not asking dad for permission to do something was a big change.

Part of being an adult child dealing with a vulnerable parent does involve a shifting of the roles.  You cannot ask for permission to do what is right when you are in a circumstance such as this. 


2.  Legally secure the owned property so it cannot be stolen or that loans cannot be placed using it as collateral
      a.  Talk with estate lawyer
      b.  Use your power of attorney before it is revoked (if you end up in a hostile situation where the victim and scammers are on one side and you are on the other side)
      c.  If necessary, court ordered conservatorship is the last resort .

Conservatorship is a kind of Guardianship , but it is restricted to only dealing with financial affairs, allowing the person to maintain their autonomy in other aspects of life.
Legal advice for the conservatorship process totaled in excess of $10,000 in our case (using a general attorney from a small town, as opposed to a Eldercare attorney specialist, which may or may not be less expensive.  Our case also involved keeping the attorney in the loop on multiple lines of evidence of financial incompetence as they became evident, which was a time consuming process, possibly not necessary in all cases)
 If the victim is sufficiently impaired that they are not capable of personal self-care (ie, beyond financial oversight needs), such as feeding, grooming, etc,  then Guardianship may be apart of this process.  Guardianship requires physician /social services documentations as well.

3.  Report to police, state and federal Fraud resources (including attorney general for your state) but don't expect much help from the law.
Even the loss of an individuals entire life savings is small potatoes in the world of international fraud.  The police system is not equipped to deal with these individual cases which often have international connections.

4.  Document, Document, Document.

5.  Recognize if there is one form of scam taking place against your senior Victim, there may be more.
Look for evidence of credit card fraud, which can be traced and for which legal/ police recourse may be available.

6.  We didn't sue the bank, but if I had it all to do over again, I would investigate this option.  The bank has a responsibility to recognize suspicious transactions, especially international wire transfers.


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For those in less perilous circumstances, or for those who want to plan for the future to prevent such occurrences

Establish power of attorney with a trusted advocate while you are still young.

Speak with your accountant or lawyer about what kinds of safeguards you can build into the management of your resources to protect you (including from yourself) while you are alive.

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The advice offered in this blog is only the opinion of the blogger and is not intended as legal advice. Proper legal council is recommended in all matters.  

Lost evidence and Erosion of Due Process

This is a true story- a true letter sent me by today --- the names have been changed to protect the innocent

July 12, 2014

 County Attorney’s Office

RE: CA# XXX-XXX

:

I am writing to express in writing my concern and disappointment about the phone call I received from you on the afternoon of July 10, 2014, informing me that the XXXX County Procesutors office and associated police detective, had lost the evidence that had been obtained in investigating the case of financial exploitation (including at a minimum credit card theft and possibly more serious theft in 2009/2010) of my father, a vulnerable adult .  It becomes clear that our family, including my father, a  silent victim, and a  vulnerable adult under Court Ordered Protection status,  will be twice victimized by virtue of police and/or court associated lack of attention to detail/ ? incompetence/ ? lack of caring, permitting the loss of important evidence that would have allowed a fair day in court, in defense of his due process rights, to occur. 

I speak for all victims of financial exploitation and fraud, and for all senior citizens who are the prey of con artists whose only living is to steal from them, when I express my alarm about what it appears has now occurred in the handling of our case.  I mentioned on the phone that it would seem our case wasn’t seen as very important by local authorities, given the loss of evidence.    I again state my belief , resulting from the current circumstances, that clearly the silent vulnerable can be neglected and marginalized in the court system, since they won’t have the wherewithal  to complain about sub-professional handling of their cases.  

You called me on Thursday afternoon to inform me that the evidence was lost.  You mentioned that perhaps it was already known over a year ago that the folder containing CDs with video surveillance from XXXXX Tire and taped interviews was missing.  You didn’t tell me that this case is scheduled for trial on July 14, 2014, something I have discovered though my own internet search for the case today.    In fact, the last I heard from the  XXXXX County Attorney’s office was in late 2012 when I sent the attached victim impact statement.   I am assuming today that the case will be completely dropped now because of the lost tapes, even though I could easily provide you again with the evidence I had sent previously (and which I am attaching to this letter). 

I recognize that we all are busy and that it may be common to wait until a short time before a deadline pertaining to a given case in order to focus on it.  However, it appears to me today that we will not have due process prosecution for a case that is to be heard on July 14, 2014, because your office not only lost the evidence, but because you couldn’t possibly pull it together in a day.   It would seem to me today that the words you didn’t speak in our conversation were that not only did you lose the evidence, but that the case would now be dropped in only a few days?   Or am I reading too much into the fact that the court date is scheduled for July 14, 2014?   (and that I wasn’t ever told this even though I had asked to be kept informed in the attached documents).

As I would hope you already know, exploitation of senior citizens and other vulnerable adults is a financially lucrative business for those criminals engaged in the process.  Individuals such as my father, by virtue of their observed incompetence, are quickly identified to sucker lists and the victimization and exploitation grows.  Until you personally experience the devastation of this practice, and a family member who becomes insidiously incompetent, you may not fully appreciate that what is occurring is, in fact, a form of terrorism, directed against one family at a time.  Nobody is fully immune.  Its cost to our society as a whole is larger than currently appreciated. 

I would like to see the XXXXX County Attorney’s office and associated detectives work to re-collect the lost evidence, allowing my father his due process.  I would also like to be reassured that this mistake results in some internal organizational soul searching, if not review of evidence handling practices.  This case should not be dropped due to our silence, or our distance from you, or because of your internal mistakes.   This is not just about my father, or our family, but it is much bigger than that.  This  is about GOOD vs BAD– in defense and representation  of ALL vulnerable seniors and other mentally incompetents who are victims of financial exploitation.  Please don’t’ let us down.  Justice for one individual DOES represent justice for all in cases such as this. 

I am copying this letter to the xxxxxx County Court where my fathers's protection status originates, for their information, as they may also have a stake in what this case represents. 

Sincerely,

Against Senior Fraud