It's Christmas morning. I arrive to start to prepare for the party. You are up and dressed.
"Where is Doloris?", you ask me, with a concerned tone.
This is a first. Doloris is your wife, my mother, deceased for almost 10 years. You have never asked such a question before. What should I tell you to answer this question. After you once mistakenly thought I was her, months ago, and I corrected you then, I vowed I would never correct you again on thinking she was around. If you think I am her, then maybe that is a blessing, a respite from the loneliness and grief of losing a lifetime partner. But today you don't think I am her. Instead, you are looking for her, thinking she has been gone a short time.
"She got out of bed this morning, got dressed, and now she is gone. Do you think she went to the grocery store?" you ask.
"I'm sure she will be here soon", I say. (Did I say the right thing? Change the subject now. Hopefully this will just pass).
But, soon you are again asking for Doloris, concerned that she isn't there. You ask again again and again, while I am straightening the room, responding with busyness, serving you coffee, etc, trying to divert the attention to something else.
Finally, we are sitting quietly. Its Christmas morning and its just me and you.
"where is Doloris?" you again ask me.
I feel the pain of the innocence of your question. I don't quite know what to say.
Finally, with tenderness and pain in my own being, I say, "Well, Dad, I am happy to hear that Mom is sleeping with you still. .................... But............ Mom went to heaven, remember?" (translation, in my mind: Mama went to heaven, remember?)
Your expression turns from concern to pain, instantly. "She did?", you say.
"Yes..............she did".................................
And, for the first time in almost 10 years I feel your pain like I have never felt it before, nevermind my own hope, as I feel my eyes well, and a tear drops down my cheek.
And with that, you suddenly brighten up and start to talk about who is coming to the party today.
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But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of great joy which will be for all the people; for today in the city of David there has been born for you a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. Luke 2:10,11
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He will wipe away every tear from their eyes; and there will no longer be any death; there will no longer be any mourning, or crying, or pain; the first things have passed away." And He who sits on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new." Revelations: 21: 4, 5.
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